VDog Blog

January 21st, 2010
Tags: Who Do I Think I Am?
Posted in Random Thoughts, VDog 17 Comments

{Girl Talk Thursday is a fun meme-y type thing. Click above for more.}

I’m certain I’ve talked about my pet peeves here before, but it’s always fun to talk about them ad nauseum.

•”Pet” anything — even the term “pet peeves” kinda peeves me. “Pet project,” “pet rock,” “pretty pet” and more all get the GAG from me.

•Calling Women’s underwear “panties.” Etymologically, an -ies ending connotes a diminutive quality to the subject. This means that OUR underwear are little pants. Call this feminism to the extreme, but you won’t catch me calling anything I wear “PANTIES.”

•People who complain about twitter-pimping and how they OMG are SO all about the writing, and then continue to pimp themselves and their blogs multiple times a day. Sorry, I just hit UNFOLLOW.

•Confusion of “their,” “there,” and “they’re.” And other spelling and grammar atrocities. (I, however, am not bothered by beginning a sentence with “And” apparently.)

•Children out in the world with dirty faces. I get that maybe you don’t want a screaming fit or whatever, but you won’t see my kid out with a dirty face. Unless he’s with his Dad. Heh.

Well, I’m fresh out. Visit today’s Girl Talk Thursday post for a funny set of peeves. I laughed. Snort.

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October 8th, 2009
Tags: self-realization, Who Do I Think I Am?
Posted in Mommyhood, Random Thoughts, VDog 15 Comments

Sometimes I want to unplug everything and drop out. Maybe I just need a vacation. One where I don’t break anything.

I’m not sure what I think unplugging will accomplish or “fix.”

I have a need to simplify my life and my commitments. I am overwhelmed easily. I try to cut out or avoid unnecessary static.

I want the channel flowing through my brain to be clear and full and peaceful.

I need to breathe.

I need space to expand my lungs and inhale life with steady, rhythmic beats, not shallow, frenetic syncopations.

I need to stretch out my limbs like I am reaching for that soft pillow of comfort that is constantly just out of reach.

I need to close my eyes and expand my chest cavity, arcing my arms backward, as if I were saluting the sun.

I need to sleep in deep dark caves of dreams that are magically filled with light and rainbows.

I want to be stern but loving, patient but punctual, open but aware.

I want to make sense of this new space and place in which I now live.

I want to be VDog. I want to be Victoria. I want to be Mother, lover, friend, sister, confidante, clown, vixen, firecracker, voice of reason, starter of ridiculousness, decision maker, and an individual.

I want to be ME.

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August 3rd, 2009
Tags: 30 Days, Blogging, Who Do I Think I Am?
Posted in Mommyhood, VDog 6 Comments

Mrs. Flinger, aka Leslie, aka one of my bestest buddies in the whole wide world and THE sexiest coder I know (phew!) came up with a new crackpot scheme: do something everyday for thirty days. We’re hosting it over on my not a mommy blog, Room 704.

Today I am on Day 3 of *trying* to be patient. To be exact, MORE patient than I usually am. See days 1 & 2 over at Room 704 to catch up.

I’m a yeller. Always have been, probably always will be. I don’t mind yelling except for when I do it out of anger. Then I feel bad. Very, very bad. I don’t want to hurt the ones I love (because I don’t make it a habit of yelling at strangers. Although there WAS this one time…) nor do I want to scare them.

So I am working on my patience. Today I’ve been MORE patient than I think I would have been had I not been undertaking this crackpot scheme of Leslie’s. However, I DID mutter something like, ‘STAY IN YOUR FUCKING LANE, ASSHOLE!’ while I was driving. BUT! I didn’t yell it. So, partial WIN. Snort.

Really this is an exercise in self-realization and self-control. I’m pretty good at the former and need a fair amount of work on the latter.

Join me as I embark on this crackpot journey and find out who I really am {under pressure}.

(Yes, this means I will be blogging more, BUT I will be internet free for the middle two weeks of the month (LIKE, ZOMG!!!), so I will write down my observations ON PAPER (how barbaric, I know) and report back when we return to civilization.)

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July 7th, 2009
Tags: Blogging, Conferences, Who Do I Think I Am?
Posted in Bloggy Stuff, Soap Box 13 Comments

Whaaaat is uuuhhp with all these Blogging (slash social media) conferences??

Since I talk about breast feeding and potty training, supposedly that makes me a “Mommy Blogger.” So I figure any conference with the word “mom” or “her” in it would be targeted towards me.

But I swear there’s like, at LEAST five new “MomCons” this year ALONE. Or it just seems that way. It’s like one of those late night infomercial get-rich-quick! schemes. “Throw a blogging conference and make it BIG!!” It’s like the in-crowd got sent complimentary “conference in a box” kits from ACME or some shit.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I pimp, too. Pimpin’ ain’t easy, as Jay-Z once said. I gots me my Room 704 Media, LLC n shit. I werk the PR and marketing for dat bitch. AND!! For the LOW, LOW price of only $18.95, you too can own your VERY OWN Room 704 t-shirt!!

From Mom 2.0 to BlissDom to SITScation to Type-A Mom to MomItForward/Evo’09 to GodKnowsWhat’sNext, I am OH-VER-WHELMED. Why not just conglomerate all these and make it a MOMapalooza? Women’s BlogConApalooza? (Let’s call the whole thing off?)

Of course, I would LOVE to attend all of these conferences, but it’s just not possible. And sure, one could say that, well, each serves a different demographic. Or at least a different geographical area (from Houston to Nashville to Vegas to Asheville to Park City and back down). But when the speakers for these conferences have so much overlap? It’s like The Real World Alumni going to speak at colleges around the US. Same content, different location.

What really makes all these conferences different? How do I know which conference is for me? With all the assumptions being made about who is throwing what and who is speaking at what — how do I find my people? I certainly can’t go to ALL of them. Admission price for the five conferences I just listed — Mom 2.0, BlissDom, SITScation, Type-A Mom and Evo’09 — would total *with early bird pricing* over one thousand dollars. (I’m not sure you heard me — ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS!!) Add in plane tickets and hotel, and hot dayum, we’re talking mucho dinero.

Now, you’re thinking, “VDog, you just be a jealous beesh.” But you’d be wrong. Well, mostly wrong.

Envious that I can’t attend all of these events? Surely. Jealous that I’m not speaking at any of them? No, not really. Either my time will come or it won’t. That part doesn’t bother me. Despite appearances I’m a fairly patient person and I try to celebrate other people’s successes — especially other *women’s* successes.

Remember the Low-Carb Diet craze of, what, five, six years ago? Sure there are still people living a low-carb lifestyle and trying low-carb diets, but the explosion of products and magazines and the downright *fervor* over the topic has all but crashed and burned.

One can make the argument that this is not what we eat — BUT it IS what we consume — how we choose to spend our time and money. So, just about the same, yes? As the cliche goes, the cream rises to the top. But what happens when SO many amazing women are putting together SO many fabulous events? What happens when you know and love the women that are throwing these conferences, and you attend one but not another? BlissDom this year, but Mom2.0 next? It’s enough to cause heart palpitations.

My point here is that this is becoming a “fad” (a “trend?”). Sure, it’s an “emerging market” that companies and individuals are looking to capitalize on. I can’t blame them a bit for trying.

But let’s look ahead to next year, or the year after. Come 2011 how many of these conferences can really survive? What will the market hold up as valuable and effective time and money-wise?

It’s hard NOT to feel like you want to go. It is, as my husband astutely observed, a way for us moms to get away from our families and just enjoy ourselves. Perhaps there SHOULD be this many opportunities to get mom away from the family? Would we be on fewer crazy pills?

Here I stand, shouting, “STOP THE INSANITY!!” We already have SO many obligations in our lives; why add in blog conference overload stress? I *know* they’re fun. I *know* it’s a chance to get away. But as of now, I am committed to BlogHer and BlogHer only, for the rest of the year. Yes, I attended BlissDom and had a FANTASTIC time. But I don’t think I can handle any more.

ZOMG NO MORE MomCons!!!! We’re FULL UP! If I see ONE more MomCon, I SWEAR TO GOD WE *WILL* THROW A FlingHer!!! DON’T MAKE US HIT YOU BABY, ONE MORE TIME!!!!

Now go buy a t-shirt.

I am adding the disclaimer that *should* someone *want* to hire me to *speak* at one or more of these lovely conferences, I will go. I’m no fool.

I will also add ZOMG ENOUGH WITH THE BLOG(her) PARTIES!!! And yes, I am TOTES guilty. Let me have it.

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