Sometimes I want to unplug everything and drop out. Maybe I just need a vacation. One where I don’t break anything.
I’m not sure what I think unplugging will accomplish or “fix.”
I have a need to simplify my life and my commitments. I am overwhelmed easily. I try to cut out or avoid unnecessary static.
I want the channel flowing through my brain to be clear and full and peaceful.
I need to breathe.
I need space to expand my lungs and inhale life with steady, rhythmic beats, not shallow, frenetic syncopations.
I need to stretch out my limbs like I am reaching for that soft pillow of comfort that is constantly just out of reach.
I need to close my eyes and expand my chest cavity, arcing my arms backward, as if I were saluting the sun.
I need to sleep in deep dark caves of dreams that are magically filled with light and rainbows.
I want to be stern but loving, patient but punctual, open but aware.
I want to make sense of this new space and place in which I now live.
I want to be VDog. I want to be Victoria. I want to be Mother, lover, friend, sister, confidante, clown, vixen, firecracker, voice of reason, starter of ridiculousness, decision maker, and an individual.
I want to be ME.
October 8th, 2009 at 5:56 pm
You are all of these things and more, my friend.
And the rest of it?
Will fall into place.
I’m here if you need a shoulder.
xo
.-= Heather´s last blog ..Open Letter #17: A Letter From Rebecca =-.
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October 8th, 2009 at 6:06 pm
Listen to yourself and make at least some of that stuff happen on a daily basis. xo
.-= Karen Sugarpants´s last blog ..The Hairshirt =-.
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October 8th, 2009 at 6:15 pm
You are an amazing woman! You are beautiful, strong and a great friend!
Love you lots just the way you are!
XOXO
.-= AmazingGreis´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday – Vacation edition… =-.
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October 8th, 2009 at 10:58 pm
Sometimes it’s so hard to just be ourselves, to try and balance everything. I feel like it’s almost a neverending battle, when you’re a mom it’s so hard to find yourself and still be everything else. (Hugs)
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October 9th, 2009 at 6:40 am
Beautiful words and soul.
Breathe.
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October 9th, 2009 at 8:39 am
Can I borrow those words??? You have said the exact thing that has been on my mind for the last few weeks…Thanks for providing me a moment to cleanse as well!
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October 9th, 2009 at 5:16 pm
Can I come with you? Wherever that place is that you can just be you…I wanna just be ME too.
.-= pgoodness´s last blog ..Rough day =-.
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October 10th, 2009 at 7:30 am
I feel like I know you. And I feel like I can tell you: That you? Are all of that. Sometimes, though, we have a hard time seeing it.
Be good to yourself, V. You deserve it.
.-= Secret Agent Mama´s last blog ..Glee =-.
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October 10th, 2009 at 3:00 pm
You need Tae Bo girl! Endorphins are the sweet nectar of life! How is your ankle?
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October 11th, 2009 at 9:32 pm
I have been experiencing the same thing lately. I really liked this post.
.-= Amanda of Shamelessly Sassy´s last blog ..Ambiguity: The other white meat. =-.
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October 13th, 2009 at 6:10 am
Drop out.
Unplug.
We all need to do that sometimes..
You are all sorts of awesome, take time to enjoy it yourself.. xoxo
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October 15th, 2009 at 7:38 am
Aw, V! It’s hard wanting to be everything to all people, isn’t it? I don’t know about Tae Bo (Leah, you’re such an exercise maven!) but even just half an hour of “downtime” can help. We all find what works for us through trial and error., My regrouping = either long hot bath with bath products (like scented sea salts), or a girls’ night out with friends. Can you find your favorite downtime activity? SO worth it.
.-= Jennifer´s last blog ..Luxury Viceroy Snowmass Resort Set to Open November 25 =-.
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October 18th, 2009 at 4:28 pm
I feel you, mama.
Do what you’ve gotta do.
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October 20th, 2009 at 3:43 pm
Hmmm. I feel you too, but I’m not sure if unplugging or Vegas solves these problems. Sounds like more of an escape to an ashram. We really ought to be able to find that for you in Berkeley. xo
.-= RookieMom Heather´s last blog ..Activity #304: Park on Mars =-.
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October 26th, 2009 at 8:29 pm
Okay, three times now I’ve written a huge response and deleted it.
I’m just gonna smoosh your face when you come home instead. I think that will clarify everything.
xoxo
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